15.8.09 saturday: spent on buying facial products and dying hair this weekend.. many ask if i went to rebond my hair cos it seems to be straighter.. hmmm.. the uncle only thin my hair.. i thought the colour came out to be orange since i could not see my back, so i was quite depressed. hahaa.. i guess friends tried to console me by saying it's brown la.. lol.. thanks..
16.8.09 Sunday: happy birthday to my host from Hokkaido! wanted to get her a book by jimmy but i cannot find one in japanese. so i buy random stuffs and piece them together. i made something very ugly.. =="
21.8.09 friday: collect the bags which i bought from spree.. a month's wait.. wee...
22.8.09 saturday: natsu matsuri! There are queues after queues line up at the stores.. after buying the food, all gather to eat.. the highlight should be yukata! 1st time wearing.. it's a good experience to see how the lady tie the band..
23.8.09 sunday: meet up with the girls and had claypot lunch @ clementi.. it's really delicious.. i'm not a fan as i dont like the burnt and hard rice but this is good~ we went to pig's bridal shop which is located @ portsdown.. that's near my office ==" she wanted a short dress but looks like prom dress.. so in the end, we voted for a long bareback dress which she liked too.. wiwit..
one dress which i think looks very creative..
after which pig and me went to watch 'Up' @ westmall.. it's so deserted.. well maybe the show was up for sometime..it's amazing how it can made me have tears rolling in my eyes when the show started.. all silent but so expressive.. it's kind of touching when the old man reminisce about the days he had with his wife.. the adventure he had with his kids are kind of normal plot..
i'm having a movie marathon tonight. i bought tickets for movie @ yishun, then head home for a bath. Met fang to watch 'The Proposal'. it's hilarious.. i like the part where sandra bullocks proposed. it's kind of unexpected.. hahaa.. the guy looks like a victim at the start of the show but get naughty as the show goes on.. thumbs up!
to my blog, I really think my parents only has eye for that idiot brother of mine. I believe she prepare the water for him. Listen to him find a job.
y wont she listen to me? Be it complains or chit chat. She is not interested in my life. She just want money from me. It is good u have a job. Ya I know. And she thought I do not cherish it. Ya I don’t. I don’t care.
I am not happy. Ever since I went to uni? I was still fine in jc but I thought that's a very wrong choice after that. Y did I listen to my parents? I must be crazy. This is not being filial, it is a fatal mistake to myself.
they don’t care whether I am happy or not. They just want me to make money to support them. Fuck.
what am I to them? Money tree?
I'm not smart. Now I'm stuck.
I wish I could disappear to somewhere, emigrate to somewhere else.
I yearn for love. Some care, concern and hugs.
I know what I'm doing, how I'm acting will not get me to what I wish for.
what to do?
because I'm so ordinary, people neglect me. Because I'm so quiet, peopl e don’t notice me.
what the hell have I been doing? Gradually as I age, I make less friends. I socalise less..
I felt lonely now. I deserve it.
all because of that ugly face I have during uni days. Y me?
y cant I be true to myself?
I'm missing out so much in life.
I am suffocating because of my beliefs.
I hate myself..
I hate myself for being too independent.
I hate myself for trying to be perfect.
I hate myself for being so obdient.
I hate myself for no confidence
I hate myself for no motivation.
I hate myself for
I really tried to come to peace with myself. I tried to be a better person after working, after I have seen a worse side of everything.
entering this job half heartedly.
as I work, I cannot help but feel that I'm underpaid.
I hate people playing so much game while working.
this is the 1st time I saw anyone play so much game during work.
I cannot understand their perspective about work. What is this man?!
it's so unfair. After playing game for the whole day, they can actually complain about having too much work. Fuck.
companies I work as temp arent like that. This slack idiot far away place. What is the meaning behind putting me here?
to train me? I am not trying to be a saint. Don’t do this.
I'm not thick skinned enough.
I think I'm the only one that finds her irritating when she browae internet. Others find her friendly, nice, helpful. I do not deny that. she knows who is the higher authority, who to sweet talk..
god, are you trying to make me see that I should try to be this way?
how many more months do I have to stay here? What is economy crisis? I don’t know.
I am past adolenscence but I want to seek attention.
I will continue to improve myself. I will try to be a better, happier person.
feel like eating so muct food: roti prata, oyster mee sua, auntie annie's green tea flavour, cake, ice cream etc..
2.8.09 Sunday: even though i'm the one who always ask if my sis want to go kbox, this time round, she said she is off today and so we went..i think i sang alot more than her.. but i really no voice to sing.. wahaha..
4.8.09 Tuesday: Car bday today! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
6.8.09 Thursday: ate sakae sushi in northpoint today.. my card is going to expire in september.. i dont think i want to sign up for member again.. 1 last time next month!
7.8.09 Friday: car bday cele..went to pasta de waraku in marina bay.. the food sucks.. to think we waited.. omg.. the pasta has a fishy smell! all pasta is like that? i went to waraku @ clarke quay and it was quite a nice experience. what happen here!? it was not fit for comsumption. sometimes when u eat and say it doesnt taste good, u still can finish it as it is not up to expectation. but this! i'll never go there again.. car with her squid sauce filled mouth.. hahaha..
This is the look normal but smell and taste disgusting pasta..
now using: i'm going to trim and dye my hair soon.. getting long and getting sick..
a present from uni mates on my 21st bday.. finally put into use in my office.. u never know when u need it!
now watching: funny..
i have not watch this show even though many rave about it long ago.. now trying to follow from tv, since screen is bigger..
lunch with colleagues these days can go up to 2 hrs.. hah..
not sure why some would act cute in front of male colleague.. some are already acting cute regardless of male or female.. i think i need to start from now.. show people what i can do..
come on, both of you are married.. what can happen?! stop being imaginative, i dont think there's anything going on, dont make it look and sound as if there is any.. ==" get a grip of yourself.. are u that bored?
i think i need to change a new blog.. since it is so easily found..
